#228 – Episode 228 – Hyperindependence


Hyperindependence is a trauma and stress response. If we didn’t experience safety as children, we often become hyperindependent as adults. Chip and Veronica break down what this means, how it affects sobriety, and what to do about it.

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about this episode

Are you too independent for your own good?

Hyper-independence is a stress response and protection mechanism that can manifest in various ways like the inability to open up to others, over-burdening yourself with work commitments, and avoiding social events.

For many of us, the roots of our hyper-independence lie in a lack of proper parenting, which forced us as children to take on responsibilities beyond our age bracket.

When it comes to recovery, hyper-independence makes it difficult to ask for help and admit when we’re struggling. When we don’t allow ourselves to build connections and receive the help we need, it puts our sobriety at risk.

In this episode, Chip and I are talking about the signs of hyper-independence and what you can do to prioritize your recovery. We discuss:

  • Signs of hyper-independence and why it can be a hindrance to recovery
  • The cultural overvaluation of independence
  • The correlation between hyper-independence and a lack of proper parenting
  • Hyper-independence as a response to trauma
  • Defining characteristics of hyper independence
  • Staying isolated despite being around people
  • Hyper-independence, loneliness, and the impact on intimate relationships.
  • Shifting the perception of emotion and failure as weaknesses
  • How our early childhood experiences shape us
  • Learning to ask for help and the value of professional help
  • Hyper-independence self-check


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